I’ll make this quick. I have a friend and he’s somewhat retarded. For the sake of the story, let’s call him E. Mowinckel. No that’s too obvious. Lets say Edward M.
I first got to know Edward by playing Team Fortress 2 with him. He always played as the Medic and his name was "Edward the Retarded Medic"… he assumed the role very well. He would scream absurd things like "THERE ARE VERY BAD MEN OVER HERE! RUN! RUN!" in a silly retarded voice (I can’t stress the word retarded in this post enough).
He listens to The Cardigans. He makes French Onion Soup about once a week (which probably says much about what his breath smells like). He replaces the word "fuck" with "frak" because he’s an huge Battlestar Galatica fan. He has a compulsion to put sandwich bags on his head… because… why not put them there? He tweets non-stop. OH GOD DOES HE TWEET NONE STOP. Here’s a few examples:
I made my own waterproof skin for my netbook, it works really well, check it out; http://bit.ly/ckOXOO
I am completely out of food, I really need to buy more. Tomorrow’s French onion soup and Caprica day, I can’t mess that up, man.
Oh, I rule. I am the number one search result on google images for The Cardigans, and Viper checklist.
I think I frakked up my sub while experimenting with the brown note.
Just a few examples. Oh and my favorite part. He’s completely unable to communicate with females:
When a cute girl at my school asks ’so what do you do outside of school?’, I really shouldn’t answer with ‘Mostly sit home and watch BSG’
Metaphorically speaking, this is what it’s like when he tries to do anything:
But at the end of the day, he’s a pretty good guy. I’m just glad we’re thousands of miles away from each other (did I mention he’s Canadian and lives in Canada? Sorry I should have said that sooner).
I’m swamped. Arcadium Software is working on a commercial project that has absorbed a metric fuckton of my time. No its not a game but we’re working on a web application for a big ass company. Its sorta weird how it came all about:
A few years ago my dad was using a really archaic method for keeping track of what vehicles he was in charge of. Like… where they were stationed. He wrote the vehicle number down on a magnet and placed it on a white board and moved them from square to square depending on where the vehicle got shipped. So I wrote him a digital version of that and since he struggles with computers, I totally mimicked the look of a board with magnets on it. Except you could double-click any “magnet” and open up extended information and tools on it. Needless to say this worked many times faster and he instantly fell in love with it. I spent loads of time in the UI so it was extremely user friendly.
Well he has since left that company and moved on to bigger and better things. Little did I know he continued to use that program and one day his boss saw him using it and one thing lead to another… next thing I know I’m in a meeting talking business for writing this company a custom software tool. So a lot of our time is being dedicated to that…
BUT THEN…
Garry decides that he wants to start a Fretta gamemode contest with some high dollar incentives. So now we’re working on THAT at the same time. Our goal is to submit two gamemodes so we really gotta bust ass on everything. We’re not going to sacrifice quality though, so its just time dedication.
BUT THEN…
All these new games have come out/are coming out and ahhhhhhhhhh. I’m deep into Fallout 3 right now, I’ve got Borderlands to focus on, Left 4 Dead 2 soon… Modern Warfare 2– fuuuuuuuuuuuuuu–
So I was doing something totally unrelated to anything I’m about to show you, yet I managed to figure this out. It’s pretty simple but its not very practical. I mean, it takes like 6 or 7 minutes to actually do it in game, which would mean you’d totally get owned in the ass in verses if you attempted it (anyone up to that challenge? send me a video of you doing it in verses mode and I’ll post a picture of my tits).
Anyways, I first tried it with the boxes, but they weren’t tall enough and I kept breaking them
Then I tried it with the hand jack, and it was barely not tall enough. Then I managed to flip the hand jack over, which was then too tall to jump on. So I had to reset the campaign again (this time not breaking the boxes) and use the boxes to jump on it. Easy enough? Sure it is, but the fucking bots like to get in your personal space so I’d recommend doing it with friends or kick the bots. On to the video!
Edit: I know it doesn’t make sense to do it, but in my defense I was trying to get the no medkit achievement ON EXPERT and spending all that time to save a little health would really help in the long run! AND NO, ZOMBIES DON’T SPAWN IN SINGLEPLAYER WHEN YOU’RE DOING THIS… I HAD NO CHEATS ON WHILE DOING THIS!
I found a holy Quran app for my phone and downloaded it so I could post in the comments "God bless u for this app" then uninstalled itabout 2 days agofrom Ping.fm
